.....

yes as i predicted...ytd was a wasted day. and so was today.
i shld just go and live in sch....since i spend most of my waking day there....on avg 91/2 hrs a day. only 5 hrs at home AWAKE. but then again...most of the time spend at home is also dedicated much to sch. so.....life is so unfair sometimes...and studying is such a misery.
but don get me wrong...when i say wasteed is not coz i spend the whole day doing sch work...is coz i DIDNT do ANY.

i hate thinking i need to depend on anyone for any reason. but sad truth i do.

i constantly question myself abt my faith. im trying to do more things to increase it. to prove to myself its my own willingness and not by default. but i still see myself far from the rest. and in that aspect i have no confidence. i just don see god working in my life all the time. i don feel his presence. im so afraid one day i'll just decide to leave.

bell